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Over the last few weeks, I have been unable to get a specific lyric from John Lennon’s “Happy Xmas/War is Over” out of my head.

So this is Xmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun

The lyric got me thinking of what exactly have I done in the last year. For some reason I find myself feeling unfulfilled, and lately I have taken to describing my mood as being in a “1/3rd Life Crisis.” On some level, this year has indeed been good. Obviously, I proudly entered the ranks of home ownership. Nonetheless, I find myself wanting. I am not big on resolutions, but here’s what is rattling around in my mind.

My Professional Life

At the same time, though, I find myself wondering if I am doing the right thing professionally, e.g., what do I want to do when I grow up. When I went to grad school, my original notion was to get my graduate degree and enter the working world. I thought I would work for a bit at either the CIA, the State Department, or the NSA, then I would get my doctorate. I would then spend the rest of my days corrupting the minds of America’s youth as a professor at some university in the land. Lately, I have been thinking about returning to academia. Especially after some people have remarked to me that they had always pictured me heading in that direction. Couple this with my opinion about my current job, and I find myself giving some serious thought to getting my doctorate.

I will admit to looking for a new job, but I am not in a hurry to do so. I work with good people, but the change I decided to make in taking this job is not the one I was looking for. I knew that going in, but I also wanted to do something different. I have found, however, I am somewhat bored with this different job–Information Technology auditing. So, I find myself trying to figure out what it is I want to do.

My Personal Life

I will admit to having some regrets as I reflect on this part of my life. I certainly don’t like to write much about this part of my life, as I tend to be intensely private about these matters. I cannot complain about the past year, so here’s hoping 2007 is better. I still feel that there are some people who I hurt by my words and/or actions–intentional or not. So, to those friends I apologize and promise to be better citizen in the new year.

Other Miscellaneous Parts

All in all, 2006 was a good year. It definitely went by a bit too fast, and I still cannot get over feeling somewhat unfulfilled. So, starting today I will work towards making 2007 a much more fulfilling year.