Ask The Oracle of Starbucks


In an effort to make last week bearable, my buddy and fellow Starbucks addict Chris sent me this link.  Here is what the Oracle of Starbucks had to say about one of my usual beverage choices, the Six-Shot Venti Americano:

Behold the Oracle’s wisdom:

Personality type: Asshat

You carry around philosophy books you haven’t read and wear trendy wire-rimmed glasses even though you have perfect vision. You’ve probably added an accent to your name or changed the pronunciation to seem sophisticated. You hang out in coffee shops because you don’t have a job because you got your degree in French Poetry. People who drink Venti Six Shot Americano are notorious for spouting off angry, liberal opinions about issues they don’t understand.

Also drinks: Any drink with a foreign name
Can also be found at: The other, locally owned coffee shop you claim to like better

So, there are parts of this I would disagree with.  Nonetheless, it is hilarious to throw some of the drinks you get and what the Oracle says. 

Partake of the Oracle’s wisdom!

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  1. #1 by Chris on November 21, 2006 - 3:01 am UTC

    Yeah you and ‘liberal’ don’t go together.
    Not saying you have a Ronny Reagan T-shirt you wear to the gym but you’re close.

  2. #2 by Carol on November 23, 2006 - 8:54 pm UTC

    Well I’m an ass-clown, and according to the oracle, well on my way to developing an addiction to crack.

    Ah well. I was hoping the oracle would be able to tell me something I didn’t already know.

    I’m opening tomorrow, by the way. Stop by for a Redeye — I added it to the menu.

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